How am I going to even fit that in my mouth? / by MEAT ME

Yes it was that fuckin’ big. I woke up this morning with one thing on my mind. All I wanted was a Napoleons and an Éclair from Café Tropical. Located right in the heart of Silverlake, CA. I know… It is not meat, but it is sweet and that rhymes so that is how I am justifying it. Plus I promise I will not disappoint. If you were driving by this place you would not think much of it at all. You might even even consider it a dump, but trust me you don’t want to judge this book by its cover.

I have always associated Silverlake with a city filled with culture. It is kind of like Hollywood, but without all the tourists and occupied by ethnicities that actually give a shit.

At every restaurant or shop they are always planning an event to get the community involved. If it is not an art show every place always has that little something extra that makes it feel special. At Café Topical everything is bigger and bigger. Yea, that is not a typo. Their shit is GINORMOUS.

Café Tropical is a great place to start the day. They have wonderful coffee (so I’ve heard, sorry not a coffee drinker) great breakfast options and a cozy space to stop, sit and enjoy the internet. There are little knick-knacks all over the place so if you even forget your laptop you’ll have plenty to keep yourself occupied. Plus with the AA type meeting room next door the people watching is never ending.

Normally when I am out I take all my pictures with my little Canon digital elph. Which at first I did, but after I saw the lighting, I knew that camera wasn’t going to do this any justice. It was time to bring out the big guns. Having gone to Art Center for photography I knew this was inevitable. This glorious food was in need of serious photographic respect. Just those cookies are 7 to 9 inches across.

As you stroll through the café all you see is giant over sized food. I literally feel like I am walking through Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. It truly is a marvel. The breakfast they offer is not as huge but just as tasty. They also serve a variety of meaty Cuban sandwiches. With that said, you can see I am not straying too far from my meaty roots.

With so much going on 12 minutes had gone by before I even got to ordering. I do not live in near by so I never know if they have specials or events going on, but if anyone knows… please feel free to drop some hints in the comments section.

I finally make it to the counter, and they are quick. If you don’t know what you want you will start feeling like your wasting their time. Deciding not to get too fatty I ordered the éclair and the napoleon. After all it was just the first meal of the day. Keep in mind each is so big that they get their own box. Having paid I needed to get home as fast as I could to photograph these delights.

I made the mistake of using a large plate (8"x 14" to be exact) to photograph the Napoleon. That was all it would fit on, so you really don’t get just how big this beast really is. It is 2 and a ½ inches wide, 3 and a ½ inches tall and over 6 inches long. I swear it had to weigh a least a pound. The éclair was a little shorter than I was used to, but wider in the middle. It came in at 3 and a ¼ inches wide, 3 inches tall and over 6 inches long...

I urge you to take a moment to fathom how big this really is. I got smarter with the éclair and put it on a desert plate. It is so massive it crumbled, creamed and oozed all over my mouth (Yep, I just got excited!). It almost died but I only took one bite of each so I wouldn't spoil my lunch. Plus I am attempting to enjoy this in moderation, but that is probably not going to happen.

Even as I think about it now, I really can’t take it any more. Once this is up I’m straight for the fridge. I will probably cut off about an inch on each piece. Put them in the same bowl with 2 scoops of Ben and Jerry’s Cheesecake Brownie ice cream, sit on the couch and try and figure out what to stream on Netflix.

I know… I can hear myself getting fatter… So until I allow myself to eat again, MEAT ME!

Look for the image of my dessert on Twitter @meatmeblog

You can find out more about Cafe Topical @

I do not believe they have a website.

Sweet Jesus,
Sean Rice aka MEAT ME!